Seth – 12 months from Eel Fang on Vimeo.
Music is Moby, “Run On”. Video spans from early October through Christmas day.
THIS BABY IS ADORABLE!
Mon 25 Jan 2010
Christmas, part 2
Posted by Todd under Christmas, Family, parenting, pictures
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Who would have thought that it would take longer to blog about Christmas than to celebrate it? Here’s the condensed version of what’s left to be told. Let me know if you want more details behind any of this!
Christmas morning, our house
Stockings and presents for Todd and Betsy (Seth got his the day before)
Ricotta doughnuts! So good!
Rushing around like crazy, trying to pack for two days out of the house
Christmas day, Betsy’s parents house
Brunch with the family
Opening presents – Seth loved helping!
Nap time for baby, reading and family time for parents
Delicious pot roast feast
Good helper
Looking at toys with Aunt Sarah
Spending time with Grandma
Pot roast, carrots, potatoes and baby
Christmas night/day after Christmas, Todd’s parents house
Seth fell asleep in the car, and was successfully moved to the crib without waking!
Great time in the evening just talking and playing games
Cinnamon rolls in the morning
Aunt, Uncle and cousins arrive
Open presents
Eating cioppino (Italian seafood stew) for lunch
Naps!
Waffles for dinner, and then back home.
Face full of breakfast
Trying on his cousin Annika’s new clothes
New truck! (He LOVES this truck.)
Three generations of Voelker men, cooking together
Mon 25 Jan 2010
PS on 13 Months…
Posted by Betsy under Monthiversary, life with Seth
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I forgot to mention that the biting is back with a vengeance (with no new teeth in sight), and you like to hit Mommy and Daddy in the face. Oh, Seth…
Sun 24 Jan 2010
13 Months!
Posted by Betsy under Monthiversary, life with Seth
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Dear Sweetheart,
You turned 13 months old today! Wow — time is really flying these days! You are so smart and curious, and amaze us by learning new things every day. You are very much into “container play” these days, and you love moving blocks in and out of tupperware, pulling the (baby-proofed) contents of Mommy’s wallet out, and opening and closing drawers and cabinets. You also get a kick out of having us pretend-eat or -drink things; you’ll hold a sippy cup for us to drink, and make a particular clicking/smacking noise.
You really like looking at your photo album. Every afternoon we pull it out and point out all your family members, and you’ll occasionally give some of the photos kisses! We’re having some great weather, so you’re also enjoying getting to go the park almost every day. You could take or leave the swing, but love just walking around on the wood chips and leaves, making a pile of wood chips on the slide, and simply being outside. You also like following the bigger kids around, and vice versa!
We had an opportunity to give a talk for the adoption agency a few weeks ago, and upon walking into the room of about 20 adults, you headed straight for the center of the circle to show off! You are so confident! Every once in a while you get a bit shy or apprehensive of people you haven’t seen in a while, but warm up within a few minutes. And dogs or people with glasses are a shoo-in every time.
Mealtimes are a bit crazy these days. You’re not what we would call picky — you’ll happily eat cabbage, broccoli rabe, and raw spinach! — but are becoming very particular of how you eat. Every meal is a guessing game of whether you will want to feed yourself; want to be fed by us; throw everything on the floor; only want to eat something if it’s a large chunk instead of small bites; etc. We’re trying not to stress too much about it, and remind ourselves of the Division of Responsibility. And you’re still happily growing; at your 12 month checkup you were around 24 pounds and 31 inches!
You have been communicating with us for so long now, but are also starting to get the hang of words. You say “Mama,” for Mommy, but you also say it over and over when anyone leaves the room. “Dada” is Daddy, but you say it rarely — usually you call Todd “Mama” too. “Mmm” is “I’m hungry,” or “that tastes good.” “Na-na” or “Bah-bah” are also used around food. You have also said “Aama” a few times –we think this might be Grandma or Grandpa. You sniff when we ask what bunnies do, and can wave bye-bye, know that keys go in doors, and we think we recognize you starting to use the sign for “all done” (which will be especially helpful for mealtimes!).
We are very proud parents, but even if you did none of the above, we would still be over the moon about you, Baby Seth.
All our love,
Mommy and Daddy
Fri 22 Jan 2010
Birth certificate!
Posted by Betsy under open adoption, paperwork
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We are now in possession of Seth’s birth certificate! I almost said “finally,” but it actually came quicker than I was expecting…
I hope I’m getting the following behind-the-scenes stuff correct: When Baby is born, they issue an original birth certificate to the parents. Aria and Ethan were both given copies of Seth’s soon after his birth. Meanwhile, because Seth was adopted, as adoptive parents, we had to wait until the adoption was finalized. Following the finalization, the original BC is sealed (except by court order), and our lawyer filed to get a new birth certificate issued (and the new one becomes part of the public record). We then got a postcard from California a few months later saying, “It’ll be a while; we’re deep in debt.” So I was pretty surprised when a couple months after that, it came in the mail!
And even though I knew this would be the case, I was a little weirded out that there is no mention of Aria and Ethan on his new birth certificate. It simply lists me as the mother, and Todd as the father. In closed adoptions, adoptive- and birth-parents wouldn’t know each other’s names – especially last names, and of course the government processes all amended birth certificates the same. But still, strange that the government would lock a part of Seth’s past in the vault. Fortunately, we know the whole story, and are so happy that Aria and Ethan and their families and friends are part of Seth’s and Todd’s and my present and future as well.
And now we get to visit Canada, too!
Openness rules, yo.
Fri 8 Jan 2010
Birthday, part 1
Posted by Todd under Uncategorized
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Betsy and I had been talking about how to celebrate Seth’s birthday. Our original plan had been to celebrate a special day for him on his half-birthdays – June 24th – but as we got closer to his actual birthday, Betsy started to have second thoughts. We kept thinking about the events of last year, and the fact that it was Christmas time was really quite meaningful to us. Moving it to the middle of the year felt disconnected from that special season. On the other hand, I argued that Seth wouldn’t necessarily have warm memories of his birth and the time of year that it happened – he would just be interested in having a special day, and if it got caught up in the rush of Christmas, he’d feel disappointed.
After some discussion, we decided that it was most important to have Seth be able to celebrate on a day when he got all of the attention and would be able to celebrate with friends, and that we should start that pattern now. We could still do something small but special for him on the actual day, and we’d always have our memories, but the big day would be in the summer.
For this year, then, our plan is as follows: a celebration on Christmas Eve with just the three of us; a small party for our families the first weekend of January when Aria and Ethan are in town; and a bigger birthday party with friends in mid-June.
Christmas Eve was pretty quiet at our house, but it was nice that way. Betsy had stayed up late the night before putting together a nice Happy Birthday sign, which Seth wanted to pull down and eat. We let him open both his birthday presents and his Christmas presents, as we knew we’d be rushed the next morning.
He enjoyed his new presents, but seemed most excited about the cardboard tubes left over from the wrapping paper:
Betsy and I alternated between preparing food for tomorrow, wrapping presents, and rolling around on the floor and giggling with Seth. We made tentative plans to go to the family service at church that evening, but as our list of things to do that day grew and grew, we decided that it was more important to be able to enjoy our time together as a family without stress than to try to cram in another event.
We even had a fun birthday adventure trip to the local clinic . Okay, so this wasn’t really a birthday thing – but Seth had been showing signs of a mild ear infection, and we wanted to get medicine before all of the clinics and doctor’s offices closed for the holidays. I made a trip to Safeway that afternoon to get the medicine, and it was the craziest scene I had ever witnessed at the supermarket. Everyone in the city was picking up their last minute supplies for Christmas, and I waited in line to check out for about 25 minutes.
I think we made the right decision about Seth’s birthday. The Advent season and the idea of waiting for the birth of a highly-anticipated child will always have a special significance for us, and Christmas Eve will always have an extra layer of meaning for us. At the same time, this year proved that Christmas Eve often already has a lot going on, and that it’s better for both Christmas and for Seth if we focus on each event fully on their separate days, and give each their space to be enjoyed as a family.
Thu 7 Jan 2010
Christmas, part 1
Posted by Todd under Christmas
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The weekend before Christmas, we drove over to Wenatchee to kick off the Christmas season with my extended family.
Wenatchee is about 150 miles from Seattle and separated from the west coast by the Cascade mountains. On a typical day, this is about a 3 hour drive, sometimes a bit less, depending on traffic. I’ve done this trip at least 2-3 times a year for the past 30 years of my life, so the route is very familiar to me.
That doesn’t mean that it’s always uneventful, though – on Seth’s first trip across the mountains back in May, for example, he got so upset about being in the car that he started crying, a light whine that quickly escalated into a screech so loud that my eyes were blurring when looking at the road, and we had to pull off to the shoulder and just let him be out of his car seat for a few minutes.
In another story, prior to Seth joining the family, I forgot to fill up with gas before going over the pass, and the “low fuel” light came on right as we were starting the push up the mountains – about a half-hour either direction from a gas station. Even though it was 95 degrees outside, we had the windows rolled up and the AC off for maximum fuel efficiency, and I was white-knuckling the steering wheel until we reached a station about 30 minutes later. I vowed to never let that happen again, and was thankful that I learned my lesson before we had a baby in the backseat. (This is what literary types refer to as “foreshadowing”.)
For our trip on Saturday, everything went as smoothly as could be expected. We left the house a few minutes later than we hoped, and our stop at the grocery store in Leavenworth took a little longer as well, and we rolled into town closer to 12:30 than our 12:00 goal, but Seth was in good spirits, the passes had beautiful snow on the mountainsides but none on the road, and everything went well.
When we arrived in Wenatchee, we met up with Amy and Lara, who were unable to make the main Christmas party, and Lara gave Seth his first (‘09) Christmas present:
The party was held at the Elliott’s house. Denaye & Gabe’s kids were there as well, including little Isaac who is a few months younger than Seth. There was a big spread of good food, lots of presents, and playing around. Since so many people were taking pictures, I left my camera in it’s case for much of the day, so the following are from my mom’s blog:
Seth hadn’t slept very long in the car ride over, and definitely couldn’t sleep when there was a party going on, so we left a little early to let him calm down and catch some winks at my grandparents house. His nap was short in the afternoon, too, so by the time the Christmas party had ended, and my parents joined us, it was just about time for us to go to sleep.
We had originally debated going over for the party, as Seth had a little cold and Betsy’s throat was feeling scratchy too, but on Saturday morning, we all felt well enough to make the trip. By Sunday morning, though, we all felt like we had been hit by trucks the day before – Seth was pretty wheezy, my nose was running non-stop, and Betsy sounded like Louis Armstrong every time she tried to talk. We skipped out of town a little early so that we could get home to rest.
I suppose I don’t need to tell you what gauge I forgot to check on the way out of town, nor what light helpfully came on while ascending the steep east side of the mountains, nor what color my knuckles were on the steering wheel while imagining myself hitchhiking on the side of the road while the frozen rain poured down in buckets around me. It is worth noting, however, that once you make it up to the top of Steven’s Pass, one can coast in neutral nearly the entire way to the Chevron station in Skykomish, and that’s actually pretty fun to do.
Overall, though, it was a great trip, and spending time with family was a fantastic way to start the season.
Tue 29 Dec 2009
Posted by Todd under pictures
[4] Comments
Christmas post coming, with plenty of pictures! Until then, check out these two pictures of the same boy with the same stocking:
12/25/2008 & 12/25/2009
Merry 2nd Christmas, little man!
Thu 24 Dec 2009
Best day ever
Posted by Todd under being born, emotions, life with Seth
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When people talk about “the best day they’ve ever had”, often they will assign that honor to the day their children were born. I don’t know about that. How can a day that was 50% terror and nervousness and anxiousness and worry be the best day of my life?
One year ago today, at this moment, Aria was in labor. One year and four months ago, I had no idea who she was and had no connection whatsoever to her, but by Christmas Eve 2008, it was heart-breaking to see her hurting as much as she did.
Obviously, I had the much easier job that morning, but that meant I had extra time to worry and fret. I paced up and down the hallways, drank cup after cup of coffee, and kept going outside to try to collect my thoughts and to listen to Sly & The Family Stone’s “Just Like A Baby” on repeat (perfect song for the situation, by the way – slow and steady enough to help you catch your breath, but with enough tension that it still feels appropriate). I didn’t know what to do or what I could do – I just knew that the biggest change ever in my life was roaring towards us at full speed and causing physical pain to someone I cared about along the way.
But then he was born, and if I’m reluctant to put the tag of “best day ever” on 12/24/08, it has no competition whatsoever for the “best afternoon ever”. The sweetness of holding that tiny infant was just beyond compare and beyond my ability to put into words.
And it still is the sweetest thing I’ve ever known, even as the term “tiny” starts to give way to “wriggly, crazy, wild, cuddly, joyful” and “infant” gives way to “big baby, almost a toddler”.
Best year ever? Absolutely.
I heard this song the other day, and I really liked the way it described a father meeting his newborn son for the first time – especially the 4th stanza. I’ll admit the room got a little misty.
The Mountain Goats – Genesis 30:3
For several days the visitors were here
We saw them turned down and we watched them disappear
Talked about the days they’d said were sure to come
Had a hard time believingI remember seeing you my tongue struck dumb
When you first came here from wherever it was you came from
The power in your voice
Your rough touchOpen up the doors to the tent
Wonder where the good times went
I will do what you ask me to do
Because of how I feel about youI saw his little face contract as his eyes met light
Tried to imagine anything so bright
You only see it once and then it steals into the dawn
And then it’s gone foreverFor several hours we lay there last ones of our kind
Harder days coming maybe I don’t mind
Sounds kind of dumb when I say it but it’s true
I would do anything for youOpen up the promise of the day
Drive the dark things away
I will do what you ask me to do
Because of how I feel about you
You keeping care of me
Keeping watch
The lyrics of this song are ambiguous in who they are directed to, and the Biblical reference in the title certainly doesn’t clear it up. I like the interpretation of this all being sung to the new baby, but alternate interpretations are certainly possible.
Thu 17 Dec 2009
Sickness
Posted by Todd under Uncategorized
[2] Comments
Extremely long night last night. The poor man is coming down with some sort of sickness – fever of just over 100 degrees, runny nose, and you could tell that he was tired much earlier in the night than he usually is. He fell asleep relatively quickly, but woke up every 30-60 minutes after that. He would then proceed to cry very loudly for the next 15 minutes, refusing to be soothed. We are still co-sleeping with him, which is both nice in situations like this (we don’t have to get out of bed to run to his room) and tough (both parents are awake and can’t take shifts, although I tried my best to fall back asleep when Betsy was holding him).
Betsy believes this is some sort of cold/flu, and thinks his crying sounds sick. I’m wondering if this is a large group of teeth all coming in at once, as it’s been a while since his last tooth, teething can cause runny noses, and his cries sound pained to me. Whatever it is, it’s not a lot of fun.
So, I’m at work with about 3 hours total sleep from last night, and in the middle of one of the busiest periods I’ve ever had at this job. Betsy had a few more hours to be in bed this morning, but she doesn’t fall back asleep as easily as I do, so I suspect she probably got less total sleep, and she has a far more physically demanding day ahead of her. It’s going to be a long day for both of us.
