conversations with Seth


This afternoon at our parish picnic, Seth wanted to eat some hot dog from a plate next to him.
Me: that’s not your plate. It’s Robert’s, but I think he’s done, so you can have some of his hot dog.
Seth, immediately popping a piece in his mouth: too late now!!

On the way home, Seth wanted me to “tell jokes.” Replacing words is the funniest thing ever to him, so I started reciting Hey Diddle Diddle, and let him finish each line.
Me: Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the…
Seth: niddle!!!
Me: the cow jumped over the…
Seth: tomb!!!
Me: the little dog laughed to see such…
Seth: snort!!!
Me: and the dish ran away with the…
Seth: moon!!

Seth, when singing the ABCs: Q – R – S – you and me…

The other day I said I needed to put on deodorant, and he asked me what it was for.
Me: it’s so my armpits can stay smelling nice all day.
Seth: You should have a whale lick them instead.

Seth has come up with a few gems the past few days…

When I told him that he’ll get one of Grandma’s molasses cookies at her house: Me not like the flavor of molasses cookies. Me DO like the flavor of chocolate cookies.

While having a conversation about his newest interests, blood and bones, we were talking about things in nature that do or don’t have blood: Is there blood in our drinks?

Apropos of nothing: Cookie Monster will tear you apart.

Board Meeting Minutes
Eelfang Household

Bathtub, 4/1/2011 6:30pm

Attendees: Seth, Chairman; Todd, Vice-Chairman

Proceedings:

Chairman announces his entry in the following fashion: “GUESS WHO COMING? GUESS WHO COMING? GRRRRRRRRRR SETH!”

Chairman requests meeting, “LIKE DADA WORK!”, in the bathtub. Vice-Chairman calls the meeting to order.

First order of business – exploratory committee formed to investigate Wiggleworms. The following interview takes place:

Chairman: WHAT WIGGLEWORM DOING?
Vice-Chairman: Looks like wiggleworm is splashing in the bathtub.
Chairman: HAHAHA! (splashes)

Vice-Chairman: Why are you a wiggleworm?
Chairman: BECAUSE ME WIGGLY! (splashes)

Meeting Recess called to allow Vice-Chairman to scrub the Chairman.

Meeting resumes.

Chairman introduces new board member, “MAMA!” Mama appears to be a crumpled-up washcloth stuffed in a plastic cup.

Vice-chairman notes the large amount of liquid dripping out of Mama, which has the appearance of bathwater, dripping out of a washcloth. Chairman corrects this observation by noting that “MAMA PEEING ON ME!”

Mama proceeds to pee on Chairman’s leg, Chairman’s hand, and on Vice-Chairman’s head.

Vice-chairman submits his report on the Bathwater to (non-pretend) Urine ratio. The Chairman has successfully met the organization’s goals of a 0% urine concentration in the bathwater. The board elects to award the Chairman with a performance bonus, payable in the form of allowing him to drink the shower water.

The board takes a shower to rinse off, and the Chairman collects his bonus vigorously. The shower ends, and the board dries themselves.

The Chairman re-opens discussion on the Wiggleworm issue:

Chairman: WHAT WIGGLEWORM DOING!
Vice-Chairman: I don’t know, what?
Chairman: WIGGLEWORM DANCING!!!!

The Chairman is dressed in pajamas and teeth are brushed.

The meeting is adjourned to allow for the reading of books and serving of bedtime snack.

When Seth is doing just about anything, he has a cute habit of saying “Hey, ___er.” He’ll be running around and say, “Hey, runner!” or he’ll be helping me cook dinner in the kitchen, and will say, “Hey, cooker!” or “Hey, baker!”

Last night, he had to go potty all-of-a-sudden as we were finishing eating dinner. I pulled him out of his high chair in a mad rush, and we hauled to the bathroom. Fortunately he hadn’t started until after I got him on the potty, and then we had a moment to breathe. A minute later, he started bearing down, and, in a low whisper, out came, “Hey, pooper.”

Seth has arrived at the stage of imaginative play. He uses his rapidly expanding vocabulary to demand that Todd or I “play!…now!!!” Seth’s friend, Ole, got him a set of fruits an veggies that velcro together, a plastic chef’s knife, and a little bag, for his birthday, and this set has been the jumping off point for a number of his games. A few of Seth’s favorites:

- He spent days upon days playing “Cookin’!” (always yelled, by the way), which consisted of chopping the fruits and vegetables, and throwing them in a little (real) pan that he had co-opted for that purpose. He also quickly learned the word “onion,” which pronounced by him reminds me of Annyong from Arrested Development.

- This quickly morphed into Store, where Seth would walk away from Todd, yelling “Bye!” and then coming into the store saying “Hi!” Todd would offer to sell a few pieces of fruit or veggies at a time. Seth always said “Yeah,” and then the whole scenario would repeat until Todd was out of wares. When Seth played this with me, he would often come back after having bought something, and exclaim that it was “old.” I would have to exchange it for a “new” piece of produce. Oh, how his play imitates my work…:/

- Then we played “Pizza” for countless days, after reading Pete’s a Pizza. After simply making Seth into a pizza got old, he liked to pretend that, as the dough, he had to be woken up first. And then upon receiving a tricycle for Christmas, Seth briefly liked to deliver pizza on his bike.

- Seth hauled his bag of colored blocks onto the bed, and drank carton after carton of “Apple” (juice). He picked up the word ‘wine’ at my family’s Christmas, so then he preferred to drink that. I kinda tried to divert him, saying that wine was just for grown-ups, or that Baba preferred water to the wine that Seth was serving him, but it backfired… We also ate a lot of “yuki” (teriyaki) and “meat.”

- The current cooking games are playing “Tacos” and “Cake.” Tacos only takes the pan (and the occasional long yellow blocks – cheese) to play. Seth shoves the pan between the comforter and blanket. I ask him if they’re done yet, and he says “Beep…minute…two” to indicate that when the timer goes off in two minutes, they’ll be done. Then he yells “Beep,” pulls the pan out, and serves me, himself, and sometimes random stuffed animals, his delicious tacos. Cake is about the same, but involves shaking some blocks into his bucket/bowl first, then transferring to the pan to be baked.

- Seth has also enjoyed going pretend-potty on our bed. He thrust his hips forward and announced “Pee!” and then would do a little dance, before going “Poop!” I didn’t want to encourage or discourage, but did remind him that we go potty for real in the bathroom, and he always would agree that this was “‘tend” (pretend). Then I’d ask him to flush his pretend potty.

- And by far, Seth’s favorite activity, and probably worthy of its own post, is asking us to “talk!” That is, tell a story about…well, Seth will tell you exactly what he wants you to talk about. His favorite topics are Huckle (which is how it started), Toad (of Frog and Toad), Ladybug, Dada, Papa, Uncle Elephant, elephants (NOT Uncle) and puddles or living in a barn, his friend Ole, riding on a donkey, etc, etc. Through a series of random words, prompts, and questions, Seth has even concocted a story about writing a “note” to “Toad” to ask him if he would like to join Seth in going to the “moon.” They would of course wear “helmet”s, bring “tools” and a “baby” (though we can never figure out which baby he means…Baby Elise? No. Baby Jesus? No. Just some random baby? …Yeah.) Sometimes Ladybug or Huckle comes with, and “Papa” always pilots the rocket.

This kid is cracking us up to no end. Oh, and all words in quotes are ones that Seth says. I thought about putting together another list of his new words, but at this point, he averages about three new words a day, so it would be hard to keep track. But a few of the newer, more notable ones are “library” and “red hot.” Sheesh!

Seth: (points to a picture of a sailboat in his book) Yaya! Yaya! Yaya!
Todd: That’s right, sailboats go in the water!
Seth: (slaps his chest repeatedly, which means “me” or “I want to do that!”)
Todd: Yep, I’m sure someday that you’ll get to ride in a sailboat.
Seth: Papa!!
Todd: That could be true! Papa has a sister who likes to ride in sailboats, so maybe someday you’ll get to go sailing with her and Papa.
Seth: (nods vigorously)
Todd: Papa has several brothers and sisters! Can you believe that? Can you believe that there are more people in the world who are like Papa?
Seth: (claps his hands excitedly, bouncing up and down) Yeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

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